With Halloween coming up, then Thanksgiving, and finally all the end of the year holiday celebrations upon us soon, we thought this might be a great opportunity to revisit the guidelines to sending a perfect thank you note.
No matter what, a personal, handwritten thank you note is the finest form of expressing gratitude for almost anything and everything we receive from someone in life, especially a gift.
A gift can be many things: a physical item, a good job someone has done for you at work or at home or an invitation to a party or meal. In fact, how about using the next two months to catch up on all those thank you notes you have been meaning to send.
In business it is the perfect time, before the end of the year rush, to send clients, customers, vendors and suppliers your thank you note for their business and service. By starting to get them written now, you can avoid being rushed and out of time later. Write them all now and send them later.
Here is a simple guide for thank you notes for both business and personal use.
Ideally, send thank you notes within 24 to 48 hours of receiving the gift. The sooner you send it, the greater the impact it will have. However, it is never too late to send a thank you note. Use this month of thanks to catch up on your thank yous, no matter how much time has gone by.
To save time and stress, keep a supply of note cards and stationery, plus postage stamps to have ready at all times. Write all your notes by hand. Take your time, regardless of how impaired you think your handwriting looks. Also, forget going green on this task. It does take the most effort and time, yet is the most tangible evidence of our genuine appreciation of the person to whom it is addressed. Pay attention to how the card faces when opened. I can’t tell you how many times I receive cards written on the wrong side or in the wrong direction.
TIPS:
For vertical, left creased cards: begin writing on the inner, right side of the folded card.
For horizontal, top creased cards: begin writing on the inner, lower side of the folded card.
Some cards are difficult to tell which way it is intended to face. Be sure to look at the back side of the card for guidance in this area.
Begin the note based on your relationship with the receiver.
For personal correspondence, where you are accustomed to calling the person by their first name, use, “Dear John and Mary,” (first name followed by a comma is correct).
When writing business notes, stick to formal salutations until you are invited to address the person by the first name: “Dear Ms. Smith:” (an honorific and last name, followed by a colon is proper).
For informal business notes, addressed to someone with whom you want to address by their first name, use, “Dear John:” (first name and a colon is also appropriate).
Be specific in your thanks.
When thanking someone for inviting you to a meal or event, mention how happy you were to share in the experience, mention a person you enjoyed meeting or a food item you particularly liked. When thanking someone for performing a favor for you, explain how important their gift of time was for you. For physical gifts, name the item, along with something nice and complimentary about it.
Don’t say: “Dear Aunt Sarah, Thank you for the lovely gift. I really like it. Love, Syndi.”
Do say: “Dear Aunt Sarah, Thank you very much for the beautiful black sweater for my birthday. It’s just the perfect item to wear at an evening occasion where I want to stay warm, yet still look dressy. Your loving niece, Syndi Seid.”
Sign your first and last name clearly at the end of your note. An exception may be to an immediate family member who knows who you are by your handwriting. Address the envelope using the person’s full name and appropriate honorific. Include your full name and return address. Use a regular postage stamp rather than metered postage to send your note.
Happy Thanking!
BONUS: This month, with enjoying football games and other events, I suggest you take some time to send at least eight (it’s a good luck number) quick and simple handwritten notes by regular mail. Take a moment to show your appreciation and thankfulness to someone you know for whatever reason you want, perhaps if only to say hello!
By Syndi Seid, the world’s leading etiquette trainer, celebrity speaker and founder of San Francisco based Advanced Etiquette.
There is an art to attending professional conferences. Invariably as the season begins people ask about the etiquette of conference attending. If you thought it was quite enough to simply pay the fees and show up, think again.
Whether you are just getting started or you are a seasoned conference participant, let’s face it, conference attending requires expending your personal resources, money, time, physical and mental commitment. So, why not make the most of the experience!
BEFORE THE CONFERENCE
1. Mark your calendar to plan ahead. Do yourself a favor, take time to plan ahead and make the most of your investment. Read all information about the conference beforehand. About 30 days out, review any additional conference information sent via email or posted online at the sponsoring organization’s website. Make note of the specific workshops you want to attend. Begin planning your wardrobe to match the weather conditions of the host locale. Pay close attention to any special requests for attire to attend certain events (e.g., the Saturday evening formal awards banquet).
2. Be prepared with all items needed for the conference. Let’s face it, people attend conferences to network, learn new ideas, get their name and company known and promote their product or service. One of etiquette’s biggest taboos is to show up at conferences without bringing enough hand outs. Do whatever is necessary to assure an ample supply of business cards and information you want to distribute during the conference. In fact, bring double or triple the amount you would normally think to bring. Or, arrange to use a local copy center. Better to bring home extras than to disappoint your colleagues by not having enough.
Starting about a month in advance, compile a list of all items you will need to begin packing for an out of town conference. Pay attention to the details, including outlining the proper attire for various events. Perhaps there is a formal night or a themed event, such as a Western Night. A good way to make a poor impression is to arrive at a formal event night wearing daily street clothes.
This kind of behavior tells your colleagues you did not read the literature or care enough to honor the event. Don’t be surprised if by not dressing appropriately, you will not be allowed inside. More about wardrobe planning: most conference sites keep you apprised of weather conditions for the location to which you will be traveling, and whether there will be any outdoor events for which you should be packing a warm sweater or jacket. Pay attention to the type of facility you will be visiting, such as the appropriate attire for a big city hotel, versus a golf resort, versus a private club in a vacation locale. Each has its own culture when it comes to attire.
3. Be responsive to all requests for information. From the time you register to attend the conference, till the end evaluation form, be sensitive to the needs of the organizers. Show your sense of responsibility by sending complete and accurate paperwork at all times, and by the due date. There is nothing worse for an organizer than to have to chase down and babysit someone to get necessary items.
AT THE CONFERENCE
1. Arrive at the conference ahead of time. This is the perfect time to check in early, get your full package of conference materials and relax in your room to read through everything.
NOTE: This is not a time to penny pinch on spending for an extra room night.
With airline schedules being unreliable for one reason or another, it is always best to arrive hours and even a day ahead. Use this extra time to rejuvenate your strength for the rigorous days ahead. Take a walk around the hotel facility and grounds to become familiar with where various rooms are located and the travel patterns you will need to take to get from one place to another during the conference. Learn how long it will take to walk from one location to another to avoid ever being late to an activity. Once the event gets underway and you are running to keep up with tight meeting schedules, get togethers with colleagues and more, you will be glad you took this extra time upon arrival.
2. Wear your name badge at all times. Because I attend lots of professional meetings, I always carry my own magnetic name badge holder and wear it on my upper right shoulder. This allows me to achieve the best networking support at all times. I want people to see my name badge and remember who I am. As a result, I will not wear a badge using a lanyard around my neck. Here’s why: it rarely faces forward for someone to easily see. It is positioned halfway down my chest which draws the eye to an area of my body I do not prefer people staring at. And, when I am sitting at a table, it is totally out of sight. To me, lanyard style badges are ideal for trade shows and exhibitions, where badges are more for identification purposes than for real networking.
3. Be on time throughout the conference. From the moment the conference begins, right through to the end, be respectful of the overall timeline for the conference; always stay with the schedule. Do not allow yourself to be delayed in between sessions. If you want to speak with someone, get their room number, cell phone number or set an appointment to meet later at a certain time and place. Neither the organizers nor the presenters appreciate being ignored or unnecessarily interrupted.
4. Meet and greet everyone with a proper handshake, a smile and good eye contact. With every day that passes, it continues to amaze me how so called professional men and women still do not know how to give a firm and proper handshake, do not give proper eye contact and barely smile when meeting someone.
5. Create a plan for organizing the contacts you make while conference attending. Take time at the end of each day to make notes about each person you meet. Organize cards and notes in a way it will be easy for you to follow up after the conference. If you are unsure about someone, take a moment the next day to say hello to the person again; clarify whatever you need.
6. Do not sign up for more than one session at the same time. Choose the one best session you want to attend, and then find a conference attending buddy to get you extra hand outs from the other sessions.
7. Remain silent during all announcements and speeches. Perhaps this is the hottest issue I hear about over and over again: participants being discourteous to the speaker. No matter how difficult it may be to hear the speaker, how boring the person may be or if the announcement or speech is being spoken in a foreign language you do not understand, you must remain silent as a courtesy to the speaker. If you must talk to someone, leave the room. If you must take a cell phone call, leave the room. Please do everyone a favor, the next time this situation happens at your table, quietly and politely ask the person to remain silent, so you can hear what is being said. And if you are the offender, stop it!
8. Stay alert throughout the conference. Conferences lasting more than a day can be exhausting. To prevent falling asleep, eat lightly throughout the conference. Drink more water than usual and keep all alcohol consumption to a minimum. Take short walks whenever possible. Wear loose and comfortable clothes and shoes. Most importantly, maintain good posture at all times. Do not slouch in the chair. Take quiet, periodic deep breaths to help the flow of oxygen and blood throughout the body. Pace yourself to get proper rest and sleep. Sneaking a quick 15 minute nap here and there does wonders.
9. Do not make a fuss or be a complainer. No one enjoys hearing complaints or criticisms about how things are being handled during a conference. When a negative situation arises that you feel needs to be reported, remain calm. Explain the situation in a normal tone of voice and ask for reasonable, mutually agreeable solutions. Thereafter, keep to yourself whatever other complaints you may have. Most professional meetings request that you complete an evaluation sheet. This is the best time to write down complaints and helpful suggestions for improvement. Or, at the close of the meeting, email or call the organizers to submit your thoughts.
AFTER THE CONFERENCE
Follow up with everyone you meet. You just never know who will turn out to be a valuable resource, treasured colleague or lasting friend. So, why not do the right thing and follow the advice of the best etiquette books, which tell us it is good manners to follow up with everyone we meet, and to certainly follow up with whatever you may have promised. We all know how difficult this task is. Some people use their return flight time to write thank you notes. It is well known the #1 sign of a true professional is when you tackle this chore; so just do it!
TIP: When first announcing your plans to attend a conference, tell everyone you are leaving a day earlier than the actual departure date and tell everyone you will be returning one day later. Then, use these two bookend times to focus on making the most of the experience. Use the day before to finalize last minute details and prepare. Use the day immediately after conference attending to focus on starting your follow up work, while contacts are still fresh in your mind.
Another idea is to actually stay an extra night at the hotel so you can relax and begin your follow up work uninterrupted; not to mention resting up. This could also be a good time to arrange meetings with colleagues you met at the conference who, like you, have delayed departure time. Or, just use this extra time to be a tourist and enjoy the sights.
HAPPY PRACTICING!
By Syndi Seid, the world’s leading etiquette trainer, celebrity speaker and founder of San Francisco based Advanced Etiquette.
When preparing name tags, consider their purpose. Always show the names in spoken order: your first name followed by your surname and affiliation. To maintain proper etiquette, think twice about the need to provide any information beyond these basics.
2) Writing a name tag
Use only big, bold block letters in all caps or upper and lower case letters. Avoid script or cursive handwriting, and do not add personalized touches that could be confusing. No matter how well lit a room may be, it is always challenging to decipher cursive handwriting, particularly by those from other countries or ethnic origins.
3) Etiquette and using honorifics
Except for specialized events, do not use honorifics and titles on name tags. These include Mr., Mrs., Ms., Dr., PhD, MD, General Manager or President. Because name tags intend to show a person’s identity quickly, they should only indicate first and last surname and affiliation.
4) “Hello, my name is…”
I confess I do not like this particular style of name badge. Admittedly, they do serve a purpose for highly informal occasions. But they seem very elementary and out of place in a professional setting. It is best to use clean, professional looking sheets, with or without colored borders.
5) Squint factor
Nothing is more disappointing than attending a conference or professional meeting only to arrive at check in and discover the name tags are terribly under presented. The names are printed too small, the company affiliation is so small you can not make it out and every other detail, shy of your birth date, is loaded onto the badge.
6) Printing name tags
When generating pre-printed tags on a computer, take care when choosing an appropriate font and font size. I find that 40 point Arial type is a good starting point for first and last names and affiliations for that tags I produce. Sometimes, it takes a little extra time to employ a little trial and error to find the correct font size and balance. However, it will be well worth the effort to achieve the optimum results.
7) Etiquette of using affiliations and logos
Even though it is important to give attention to the sponsoring organization, always remember that the essential information on the name tag is the person’s name, not the organization’s. By this, I mean the bulk of the space should be devoted to presenting the person’s full name. Thus, the scale of the logo or sponsoring affiliation should be much smaller than the attendee’s name. It should never dominate the tag.
8) Printing the first name larger than the last name
While there are no hard and fast rules governing whether to enlarge the person’s first name, I submit it is best to print both the first and last name in the same size font. With so many men and women sharing the same first name, it can be confusing to see a lot of Susans or Stevens walking around. But, again, this underscores the value of regarding one’s full name as one’s personal branding vehicle.
9) Etiquette for using reusable name badge at various events
While arriving with your very own custom designed name tag assures you that you will present your name and affiliation to your absolute liking, it may not be in your best interest. Consider this: event planners usually create name tags specific to a particular occasion to identify, at a glance, those who legitimately belong at the event and those who do not. Unfortunately, wearing a custom name tag you created may inadvertently convey the impression of being a party crasher!
10) Company ID badges
Many companies require staff to wear name badges for instant identification purposes. In this case, wearing such badges on the left shoulder is customary.
11) Placing name tags straight and in plain view
Never allow your name tag to be worn crooked, sideways or even upside down. It sends a negative message to others, usually implying a lack of respect for the occasion or a lack of care or interest in your personal appearance.
Never wear a badge upside down. Though it may sound silly, believe it or not, I know someone who deliberately wears his name badge upside down. He claims it is the best way to meet women. Why? Because he says women will go out of their way to approach him to help him correct what they perceive as his oversight. My friend claims men are far less likely to mention it or bother helping. Needless to say, I do not recommend this practice to anyone.
In my book, this tactic sends the signal that here is a person who cares little about the image he conveys. Who would want to convey the impression that they purposefully missed something as simple as adequately wearing a name badge? What else might be missing? In other words, while it is possible that one person may take this for humor, another person may take it as incompetence. Why risk creating this kind of confusion?
12) Last but not least, etiquette on where to wear a name tag.
Always wear your name tag on your upper right shoulder when networking at professional functions or social events. Here’s why. Place the badge as high up on your right shoulder as possible. This will give other people the best and easiest view of both the tag and your face. As you extend your right hand for a handshake, your eye and arm are already drawn to the right side of the person you are greeting. Because the uppermost part of your chest is the flattest area on your shoulder, this helps your tag to lie flat and be more secure.
These points are especially relevant to women, as most women feel awkward drawing attention to an area of our chests we would prefer not to. Placing it in an easy to read and visible place keeps the focus where it should be.
Designing your name tags
Adding credentials of any form to name tags is easy when you shop at www.nametag.com.
